Dimensional Warriors Comic Page 57

Paul Ryan Should Take Over After Me

By Pope Benedict XVI

His Holiness spoke at a meeting of the College of Cardinals yesterday. A transcript of his speech is printed here.

Your eminences. Dear brother bishops and priests. Dear brothers and sisters. Dear alter boys. I sprinkle holy water in your general direction.

As you all know, I will be stepping down in approximately a week, due to stress from old age and definitely, absolutely, not anything else. I assume you are currently deliberating on whom the next pope will be. I am aware that I am not supposed to be a part of the decision on the technicality that I was supposed to be dead before it took place. However, due to the current circumstances, I have decided to at least point out my preferred successor: Paul Ryan.

Let me briefly explain why I feel he is the right man for the papacy. First of all, he has never touched anyone inappropriately, unless you count- actually, never mind. Second, Ryan’s adherence to the philosophies of Ayn Rand makes him the perfect choice to lead Catholicism’s spread of the word of Jesus Christ. Ayn Rand believed that everyone’s only life goal should be to pursue their own rational self-interests. If other people fall on hard times, that is clearly their own fault and so society should not help.

Paul Ryan is an excellent Catholic for agreeing with Rand on these wonderful values. He believes that such a philosophy is in-line with and actually enforces Christ’s teachings to feed the hungry and clothe the poor. I could not agree more. That is why, logically, I keep a copy of Rand’s novel, Atlas Shrugged, next to my personal Bible in my study.

I would even go so far as to say the Ryan Budget is the values of Jesus Christ translated into numbers and dollar signs. I mean, it may as well have been written by a pope like me. Cutting food stamps for low-income families? That sounds just like feeding the hungry. Lowering housing subsidies for even the working poor? A fresh and modern idea. Let’s not forget, the budget would do all of that while simultaneously increasing military spending to astronomical levels, a perfect way to achieve Jesus’ goals of peace and understanding.

I can see it now: Pope Paul Ryan, former U.S. Representative from Wisconsin and Vice Presidential candidate, addressing the church’s loyal followers in St. Peter’s Square and wearing my sacred robes. The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit will surely look down on the moment and concur with his infallibility.

                                                                                                                                 By Mike Vandenberg

Weekly Report 2/18 - 2/24

Before I begin this report I would like to point something out. This blog, and eventual website is primarily for works-in-progress. Whenever we get material that is publishable, we work to find a market for that piece. Otherwise everything here may still go through several iterations before seeing publication. The exceptions are some of Javier's work, and Professor Astonishing. Both are here looking to build a fan base for various
reasons. Now onto the week:


Mike:
Might not have something up tomorrow due to the fact that we are looking for someone to take up his most recent pieces. In fact if anyone knows of any papers that accept outside contributions and have a place for Political Satire, please let me know.


Dimensional Warriors:
Again I've taken in the new comments/criticisms I've received and reworked the opening, again. Here we are with Dimensional Warriors 11.05 now with hopefully a hook. Hopefully.

Dimensional Warriors v11.05
Word (.doc)
Open Office (.odt)
Rich Text (.rtf)
Text (.txt)

GCIB:
We have the first short story from Brian Mayor, we will obviously work on it and getting something bigger out there, but for now this is a nice teaser:

Pavel's Jungle
Word (.doc)
Open Office (.odt)
Rich Text (.rtf)
Text (.txt)

Comics:
Both are ahead of schedule. I'll be talking to Ted today, however, about changing the look of both the Solarus and the guns they use. Which won't be a retroactive thing, and probably won't be fixed for the earlier pages until we publish the comic in novel form. Also this week will be the end of the Roosevelt story line in P. Astonishing. The next arc will be a long one, like the Introduction.

Javier:
Just put out a new song with an accompanying video. We'll be posting that up next Thursday.

Professor Astonishing Page 15

Dimensional Warriors Fan Fiction: Training Chapter 2

Here

New chapter is up. Now for this week:

Saturday: Professor Astonishing
Monday: Weekly Report
Tuesday: Mike's Politics
Wednesday: Dimensional Warriors Comic
Friday: Dimensional Warriors Fan Fiction

Javier Aladren: Peace of Mind

The last song from Javier, a haunting tune that makes full use of his talents with a keyboard. This is definitely a powerful piece.

I'll be talking to Javier about other possible contributions to the site, as well whenever he finishes a new track I'll be posting it up.

Dimensional Warriors Comic page 56

Fight's almost over, enjoy it while it lasts folks.